Ask HN: How do you describe what your relationship brings you?
I've been struggling to put into words what I want from my relationships and began asking my friends what their answers were, and so now I ask you.
A tribe is a group of people who act as a single unit instead of multiple individuals. A marriage is the same with two people.
Love is the unconditional, unequivocal commitment to the welfare of another. This makes it very susceptible to abuse - you can simply use a loved one for endless money, sex, or labor for example.
Much of society has formed to protect individuals against the abuse of love, often to the point where we think love is evil. Restrictions on marriage, people are decoupled from their jobs, welfare is villainised. Unbounded love leads to tyrants and child abuse.
But love is still necessary for society to thrive. Love is by nature unbounded. And one of the hardest optimization problems of being human is deciding who to love.
> And one of the hardest optimization problems of being human is deciding who to love.
I truly agree. But then what do you look for in a relationship ? Cause to any optimization problems there are constraints and an objective function to push the metaphor ?
Warmth, intimacy, companionship, curiosity, discovery.
Drama , pain and suffering, which is why I've largely given them up
Hope you'll find someone with whom this will be different
Someone to share my life with. Someone to share moments with. Someone to share jokes with, thoughts. Someone to share trouble with. Someone to connect with, to have human contact with.
Joy, happiness, meaning, purpose, connection, shared objectives and target outcomes, in various parts, depending on person and relationship. “Find your people.”
(who your partner is will be one of, if not the most, important decisions of your life; your friends and community are a close second, with professional network being important but not nearly as much as the first two)
Thank you for the reply