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Ask HN: Do you sell to your friends?

1 points by dmitripopov 6 years ago · 2 comments · 1 min read


My product is featured on BitsDuJour today, and early in the morning I got a purchase notification with dramatically familiar name and email. I refunded the order right away and contacted the person with anger and frustration. I always give away free licenses of my product to people I connect with personally, so it was very disappointing to know that someone I know so well tried to buy a license instead of just asking for it. She replied that asking for a free license of a 299USD product was unacceptable for her self-esteem and the full price was too high so she took advantage of the discount. Oh well...

Now I am left with mixed emotions. Is it OK after all to sell to your friends? Given that it is not a physical product and it does not cost me much to give it for free. Furthermore there may be others who even felt uncomfortable when I angrily rejected their money...

What is your experience with situations like this?

gus_massa 6 years ago

Don't be angry, take this as a friendly support of your business. She think that it's a good product and she need it, so she wants to buy it. As a side effect, the money will help you to keep your business afloat. It's a win-win.

It depends a lot on the nationality/ethnicity of each person. Where are you from? Where is she from? If you are from country A and she is from country B and both live in country C you need an UN expert to answer the question.

It also depends on the profession. Some profession have an honor code. Some professions are more eager to give a free first consult. And it probably depends on other factor too.

Have you offered to give a free license? If she refuses the free license, should you offer it again? It depend s lot on the nationality/ethnicity.

Can you offer a free upgrade? I'm not sure if this is an aceptable solution for both parts!!!

tl;dr: Humans are complicated :)

  • dmitripopovOP 6 years ago

    Anger was an initial reaction :) I got cooled down pretty soon.

    We share the same ethnicity but live in different countries now. I think it has more to do with personal traits than ethnicity.

    Anyway, I can't except her money. I guess it's a kind of my own personality glitch :)

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