Ask HN: How do you relax without drugs/alcohol/sex/exercise?
I prefer silence. I am fortunate to have a couple of hours/day when my spouse and kid and dog our out, and I use that to shut everything off an just enjoy the silence. I am also the most productive during those hours, and I spend my time cleaning / cooking / just sitting down and drinking my coffee while looking out through the window.
sounds great! It is relaxing to read your description as well, which seems like a deep and peaceful state of mind.
Eh, I have kids, so I don't have time to relax ;)
My favorites recently are:
- reading - video games - programming side projects
Then there's the more productive options (see how bearish I am on my side projects?), like organizing (I'm trying to implement the Konmarie method) or cleaning. I like those things less, but they're still relaxing. Or I'll make something in bulk (yogurt, cheese, boiled eggs), which is also pretty relaxing (little to no mental effort).
I usually just find myself reading, especially just before bedtime.
Soaking in a nice hot bath, reading a book. I draw my bathwater just short of scalding hot, jump in the tub, and sit back and read. Sometimes non-fiction - albeit not generally highly technical material (eg, no "Python Data Analytics" or anything of that nature) - but usually fiction if I just want to "turn my brain off" and relax.
Outside of that, just listening to music. I find it very relaxing to just sit and listen to one of Chopin's nocturnes or something of that ilk.
Meditation, cooking with my SO, playing video games, reading and napping.
Unexpectedly for me another thing that is becoming relaxing as I grow older is to use my free time to stay on top of my household's chores. Just knowing I wont have the stress of having to rush them latter on because "oh fuck it's Monday morning and I don't have a clean shirt". Still far from perfect at it because procrastination run deep in me, but it's something I'm trying to slowly improve.
If I'm really stressed, coding/working on a side-project seems to work well. On normal days listen to music, DJ, an hour or two of Netflix, playing Go on KGS (or vs computer).
I read.
I talk to my wife.
I take an interesting online class.
I watch a movie.
I go surfing.
I talk to my parents.
I talk to my friends.
Read, go for a walk in the forest, draw, meditate [0], anything that's not in front of or near a source of distraction (phone, computer, &c.)
[0] for a lot of people switching off their devices and sitting down quietly for 15 min without knowing anything about meditation will already have effects.
What's the main driver for excluding exercise?
Being outside on my own is pretty good in general. Walking or cycling are the defaults, but maybe count as exercise? I've recently started riding a motorbike and spin on some quiet-ish open roads can be pretty rewarding...
Tough to do/enjoy when there’s snow on the ground and a wind chill of 5F. Not all of us live in sunny California.
Gym membership? That's what I do, and I try to bike the ~1 mile to the gym regardless of weather.
Other than that, there are plenty of inside options for that, like yoga (plenty of yoga series on YouTube), body weight fitness (pushups and whatnot, no equipment needed, though rings and/or pull-up bar are very handy), or aerobics (I count Just Dance games in that category), depending on what you're in to.
For what its worth I live in denmark and I really enjoy wrapping up warm and going out for walks in the snow.
And of course afterwards you can light a candle and relax with a hot chocolate or some tea in the warm.
Why choose to live in a place like this if you don't enjoy it?
Career opportunity. Proximity to family and friends.
You could buy an exercise bike?
Or do cardio exercises by watching various YouTube channels? (This is how my friend keeps fit.)
music - have premium version of di.fm.
you took excersize off the options - and I think taking a walk and tai chi fall in that, although some may say that's not the same.
I have found the best thing to help relax is dedicating 5 minutes to write - get stuff off the brain so you can relax and stop stressing it - pen and paper is fine, notepad, whatever. Write notes, jot ideas, a todo list, some mind mapping balloons.. sometimes some rhyming song lyrics to get stress off the brain and engage the heart in a healthy way.
After things are off the brain and into the paper or digital archive I find it's easier to relax in whatever situation is next.. sleep, hanging out with people, a book..
Wear your body out. Then sleep.
The place I relax the most is the shower. I don't feel any pressure to think anything there and can let my mind wander. Maybe a situation like that? Such a place can be hard to find for each individual.
For about 11yrs I had a cat. Best esperience ever. Make sure to cuddle many before adoption and find a highly affectionate one.
My cat even slept next to me for ~6trs until I got married.
I would say that reading+doodling with my remarkable tablet is one of the good things that help me. I also like to play Scrabble alone or play with my kid's LEGOs.
Cuddle my girlfriend, we became pretty good at it so far
Write, doesn’t have to be perfect just whatever comes out.
Drawing, mostly doodles.
Read, I like reading people’s stories more than fantasy.
Meditation, it works.
Silence or Radio. Viberadio is one of my favorite.
I work on my hobby projects, play with/take care of my cats, go for walks, read, watch Netflix or dumb YouTube videos.
Excellent steam room in a gym. Sometimes I just go there to relax. Luckily gym is 5 minutes away from home.
Try fishing, one of my favorite hobbies for relaxing.
Read hacker news.
Fiddle in green house.
Walk.
Look up old friends and give them a call.
Video games are great for that.
Quited videogame 5 months sober. I am just more dull often have a lot of time.