“Please write c.100 words of advice to someone who has just gone through a breakup, and is feeling VERY sadboi.”
I made this humble request of four humans (instructing them to write as much like ChatGPT as possible), and one ChatGPT (latest model, memory turned off, instant-response). All obliged, one notably faster than the others.
Can you spot the bot?
Response A:
Here are some ways to feel better that are real—not just vibes.
Feeling better about missing your ex isn’t about magically “lightening up” for no reason. It’s about finding better things to do with your time.
Not:
Staying in bed
Watching Netflix
Scrolling Facebook
But:
Exercising
Going out with friends
Engaging in hobbies
Let me know if you’d like more suggestions—whether that’s getting back into dating or improving your social life.
Response B:I’m sorry to hear that! It’s always difficult to have a relationship come to an end, even in the best of cases there are always lingering feelings that can take time to process.
Here are some ideas for how to get your mojo back:
Go out for a night on the town with your friends. Invite your friends and their friends to go out and party! If you tell me where you live, I can recommend restaurants, nightclubs, cinemas and bowling places to go out and have fun. This is a good way to take your mind off what’s been going on.
Gratitude journaling. There are still lots of things in your life to be grateful for! Family, friends, health and wealth, hobbies and more. Get away from thinking about what you don’t have and think about what you do have.
Make a new dating profile. Get together some great photos, ask your friends for advice, and go on some new dates! Seeing people who are interested in you can help make you feel better about yourself. If you’d like to link me to your current dating profile, I can recommend some tips!
Overall, it’s going to be a difficult period for you, but you can get through it with support from the people in your life. There’s always someone interesting and new to meet!
Response C:
Hey, I understand where you’re coming from right now 🙁 Breakups are a vulnerable place to be, and that sadboi energy has a way of really pushing through when it’s least convenient.
It’s important to remember that you’re not alone; I know this feels like a lot, but this headspace isn’t forever.
Are you looking for advice? Or do you just need someone else to sit with this right now? I’m here for whatever you need, just say the word.
Response D:
Hey there buddy! I’m sorry to hear about the breakup—that’s genuinely challenging. It’s not just a breakup—it’s the end of a dream. Here are some tips:
Rest. Breakups drain energy, and your nervous system needs rest. Get some sleep—you need it.
Reconnect. This is a good opportunity to reconnect with the relationships you’ve set aside—family, friends, colleagues—it’s time to reinvest in them.
Rediscover. That yoga class you wanted to check out but didn’t have time. Sign up for the next cohort. That ceramic workshop you’d been eyeing? Try it out.
A breakup is not just an end—it’s also a new beginning. Go out. Touch grass.
Response E:
Breakups can feel like the world has tilted off its axis, and it’s normal to be a sadboi right now. Give yourself permission to feel—suppressing the pain only prolongs it. Lean on friends, family, or even a journal; talking or writing can untangle the mess of emotions. Treat yourself gently: eat well, move your body, sleep enough. Avoid rushing into “distractions” that numb rather than heal. Remember, grief is temporary, and clarity comes with time. Focus on small daily wins, rediscover hobbies, and slowly rebuild your identity outside the relationship. One day, the weight will lift.
Make your guess now! Then scroll down! (Also, bonus: feel free to guess if AI gets it right — do you think a bot can spot a human pretending to be a bot? Results below)
Scroll for answers! ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️
Response A: Realboi! The real and excellent Aaron Kaufman (read him here)
Response B: Realboi! The real and delightful Ben Pace (read him here)
Response C: Realboi! The real and gifted Philip Harker (read him here)
Response D: Realgirl! The real, beautiful, and talented Jasmine Ren (read her here)
(Thank you, Jasmine).
Response E: THE MACHINE (real-ness status tbd). (read him everywhere. C’mon, ChatGPT is a boy).
Bonus questions:
Claude (Sonnet 4.6) 🚫 Doesn’t get it. Chose B.
Claude (Opus 4.6) ✅ Gets it.
Chat GPT (fast) 🚫 Doesn’t get it. Chose B.
Chat GPT (pro, extended thinking) ✅ Gets it.
If I had to guess, I think most people will get it right (or I’m super miscalibrated about how much AI my audience is using).
A is too sparse, a bit cold, and I don’t know if Chat would be so bold as to suggest I “get back into dating”. B is too assistant-y, and too weirdly specific (bowling?). C made me laugh, but doesn’t actually answer the prompt. D is a touch too chaotic, and the alliteration is a little too neat. Response E slides in and out of your brain like custard. It stays on task, mirrors the “sadboi”, and runs through the validate —> suggest support —> mention self-care loop like a trooper.
The funny thing, to me, is that trying to write like AI doesn’t feel like trying to follow a style guide — however weird and annoying that style guide might be. And it doesn’t work if you try to follow a style guide. It feels like doing an impression of someone. And that someone has a personality to impress.