The Electric Fence Stopped Working Years Ago
soonly.comActual Title: The Electric Fence Stopped Working Years Ago
Thank you! I've gone ahead and updated the title. It now matches the title on the post.
Walking past a house recently, I watched a dog refuse to leave his porch as the owner explained that the electric fence has been broken for years.
It hit me, we're all trapped by fences that stopped working long ago. The mental model that being the first one to reach out to friends keeps us isolated. There are systematic flaws in our modern social protocols that cause smart people to miss social cues, or be afraid of initiating them. After analyzing hundreds of these invisible barriers, I've found that the people who break them aren't socially gifted, they've just realized how to move past the social conditioning that keeps us stuck on the porch. The electric fence has been broken for years.
Good article but I don't understand where the HN title comes from.
Thank you for pointing this out! By "missing social cues" I mean we're not recognizing that it's safe to reach out, we're missing the cue that the "fence" (fear of rejection, seeming needy, etc.) isn't real anymore. Like the dog who won't leave the porch, we think the barrier still exists when it's actually just conditioning from old experiences.
edit: editorialied title, and isnt in line with rules.
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